Broken Hearts Mended

“What the hell am I doing here?” Marcus asked himself for the millionth time as he sat in his car in front of his first love’s home. The fact that she was here…back in Charlotte..had thrown him for a loop. He’d thought that he would never see her again but now she was here and he was having a hard time not going to her. He couldn’t remember a time when he hadn’t felt that invisible current that pulled them together. It hadn’t been like that with anyone else..not even with his ex-wife. Trying to get over Sanaa, had never worked. As much as he’d tried to..and he’d tried pretty damn hard..it just never happened. Maybe because they had unfinished business perhaps? She’d left him high and dry fifteen years ago..no explanation…no letter…no phone call..just absolutely,positively, nothing. She’d never come back to visit or see him. For years, he’d wondered why she’d left him without any explanation. He still couldn’t figure it out to this day. He sighed. Well he wasn’t going to find out by just sitting here. He opened the door and stepped out of the car. Time to go face his past…He prayed that he would stay cool, calm, and collected but he had a nagging feeling that he wouldn’t.

Sanaa closed the curtain quickly before Mark could see her. She had been watching him for the last ten minutes as he sat in his car and now he was on his way to her door. She tried her best to ignore her racing pulse and the increase in her heart rate. It had been so long since she’d last seen him. What was he like now? Was he the same person she’d always known? She sighed as she thought about what had pulled them apart and made her leave Charlotte. Her father. He’d made her leave as soon as she’d graduated from high school. He’d threatened to cut off her trust fund if she continued seeing Mark. It wasn’t so much the threat of him cutting her off. It was the dangerous glint in her father’s eye that said he would do more to get her to stop seeing Mark and leave Charlotte if he had to. He wasn’t beyond getting violent. She didn’t want Mark hurt so she’d left him and all they’d had together. Her father had never liked Mark but he had never threatened him until that day. Her father was dead now which gave her relief instead of sorrow. He had been a sorry, lonely, and vindictive bastard and she’d wished he had been someone else’s father instead of hers. Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard him knock. Oh God, he’s at the door! Okay,okay, just breathe, girl. Don’t lose it. Taking a deep breath, she crossed the living room floor and opened the door.

She plastered a smile on her face that she hoped didn’t look strained. “Mark, what are you doing here?” Damn, he was sexy as hell. If it was possible to look even better when you were older, then Mark definitely had it pegged. He was taller than her five foot two inches..much taller…His hair was grayed at the temples but the rest was black and it hung at his shoulders. The shirt he had on allowed her an incredible view of his lean, hard body, and his jeans should be outlawed. They weren’t tight on him but she could see the outline of his powerful legs and his round backside. Before, she could catch herself, she groaned. Her eyes flew to his, for a moment she saw desire there but then in a flash it was gone.

He smiled although he wasn’t sure if it was genuine or not. He was all tied up in knots. “It’s good to see you. It’s been a long time, Sanaa.” His gaze traveled over body. She certainly wasn’t the skinny teenager he once knew. Her hips were now shapely and they flowed into a slim and taut waist. Her breasts…he averted his gaze. He didn’t even want to go there right now. He was having a hard time as it was thinking straight and he was so trying not to look at her navel piercing. His gaze came back to her face. She still had the same chocolate-colored eyes and honey golden hair..except now it was cut short and wavy. Hands down, she was still the sexiest woman he’d ever known.

“Yes, it has been a long time, Mark. How have you been?” She cringed at her lame attempt to get the conversation started. Hell,they weren’t distant friends that hadn’t seen each other in a while. It was more than friendship between them.

He studied her. She looked as uncomfortable as he felt. “Truth?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

Here goes nothing. “I have been okay but not the same since you left me and Charlotte without an explanation. I did my damnedest to find you but I always got stonewalled. No one wanted to tell me anything. So, tell me princess, where the hell have you been?” He couldn’t deny he was angry with her..Angry at how she’d left and took his heart with her….Angry at how she’d never tried to contact him or find him. How could she just forget about him so easily when he’d never forgotten her? “You know what, let’s just forget it. I shouldn’t have come here.” He slowly backed out of the door and then turned to go to his car. This was a mistake. A huge mistake. He didn’t get far before he felt her arms slip around his waist and he froze.

“Don’t go, Mark. Please, let’s talk. Okay?”

He felt himself relax in her arms despite the fact that he was angry. She always knew how to get to him. He use to love when she would hold him like this. He sighed and she tightened her hold on him.

“Now, you want to talk? After all these years, Sanaa? Why couldn’t you pick up a phone or something?” Dammit, he sounded like a whiny ass man. Part of him didn’t care because she’d always had him open like this but another part of him wanted to close himself off to these emotions. To not feel hurt.

“I..She trailed off.

“You what, Sanaa?”

“I should have a called or wrote. Year after year passed and it just got harder and harder to pick up the phone. I mean, what could have said that would have made this any easier?”

Hell, if he knew. “I loved you so much, Sanaa. And you just took that away.”

She blew out a breath and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. “I’m sorry. I still love you, Mark. No matter what you may think of me right now, know that I never stopped.” She placed a kiss on his back through his shirt. It felt good to hold him again even if it was just for a short time.

He sucked in a sharp breath. He might as well have been naked. He’d felt the heat of her lips through his shirt. Damn, he was on dangerous ground here. There was so much he wanted to do and say.

“Mark, will you please look at me?” She pleaded.

Before he could stop himself, he turned in her arms to face her. “Tell me again.” His voice rasped.

“I never stopped loving you. How could I ever do that?” She swallowed and forced herself to continue. “I never wanted to leave you. I was forced to leave by my father. He threatened to take away my trust fund but I still refused to go. Then he sort of used you to make me leave. I didn’t want you hurt so I left to go to D.C. to college and that’s where I have been ever since. I’m so sorry that I hurt you. I thought I was doing what was best. I thought by now, you would have forgotten about me.”

He shook his head. “Never. I can’t believe you left so you could protect me. I know your dad didn’t like me but…wow.”

“Yeah. I know. Do you understand now?”

He nodded. “You should have come to me though. We could have left together. Didn’t you trust me?”

She sighed. “Mark, all I wanted was to protect you. My dad was an insufferable, lonely, vindictive bastard. He didn’t care about me or you. He couldn’t wait until I was eighteen so he could get rid of me. He just used you to get me away from here. I know that now.”

He clenched his jaw. If her dad was still living, he’d pummel the man for what he’d done. He pulled her into a tight hug. “I’m sorry, Sanaa. God, I-

She pulled back and placed a finger on his lips. She shook her head vehemently.”No. Don’t do that. It’s not your fault. Not. Your. Fault.” She repeatedly fiercely.

He nodded and kissed her finger. “I’ve missed you so much.”

She lifted his shirt slightly and slid her hands underneath it. She felt his muscles tense beneath her touch. She should have come back sooner to be with him. She should have fought instead of letting her father control her. She had to stop this. That was the past. They were here together now. Feeling more boldly than she ever had in her entire life, she rose on tiptoe to kiss him. He met her halfway, apparently having the same thoughts as she. His kiss was gentle, exploring the crevices of her mouth and lazily stroking her tongue. Her hands slid up his back and the kiss changed to one of need and hunger. She held on as he devoured her mouth. God, he tasted so good. Moans and pants filled the air. Before she knew it, she was being carried into her house. She held on tight as her body trembled violently. This would be her first time with a man. Sure, she’d dated over the years but never had she felt any man was worth giving up her virginity to except for Mark. She could tell he wasn’t one but it didn’t matter.

Somehow, he managed to find her bedroom. He couldn’t believe he was about to do this. They had planned to have their first sexual encounter graduation night but that had been ripped from them. Now, he would do everything in his power to make tonight special for her. He gently laid her on the bed. He had to fight the urge to rip her clothes off. If she kept looking at him like that he wouldn’t be responsible for his actions. Pulling her to the edge of the bed he removed her shirt and sports bra. Her shorts and panties followed shortly afterwards. For a moment he looked at her…she was so beautiful. Everything he could ever want.

“You’re still dressed, Mark.” She said huskily

He grinned. “That can be remedied.”

She scooted closer to him. “Lift your arms.” She whispered. She pulled his shirt over his head and took in the vision before her. She groaned. His body was hard and lean in all the right places. His arms were bigger than they were in high school. His six-pack was so beautiful, as if it was sculpted just right. She found herself leaning over to kiss it. She heard him hiss at the contact and his hands tunneled through her short hair. She licked and nibbled then circled his navel with her tongue. She slowly unzipped his jeans and pulled them down along with his boxers. Her eyes widened as she saw how big he was. How the hell was he supposed to get that into her? She wondered. She lifted her head and met his gaze. She saw as realization dawned on him that she was indeed a virgin.

“Sanaa you’re

“Yep.”

“You’ve never been

She shook her head. “Not like this.”

“Why? Don’t get me wrong, I’m honored but what were you waiting for?”

She looked down. Suddenly, she felt embarrassed about being a virgin and the reason she was still one. She began to push him away but he caught hold of her arm and held her still.

“Answer me, sweetheart.”

“I was saving myself for you, okay? I didn’t want anyone else to take away my virginity. There. Now you know.”

He was truly stunned. He looked at her as she tried to avoid making eye contact with him. She was truly remarkable in every way. He put her arms around his neck and lifted her into his arms. He then sat down on the bed with her in his lap. “Are you sure you want to do this? Once, we start, that’s it. I’m not pulling away.”

She nodded. “Yes, I’m sure.”

“Good.” With that, he lowered his head to her breast and flicked his tongue against her nipple. When she moaned, he pulled it in between his lips and sucked.

“Mark” She whispered. She arched her back as he paid attention to her other breast. This was incredible and they were just beginning. When he touch the folds of her vagina, she nearly screamed. He slid a finger inside her and she moved her hips with it. She looked into his eyes and he increased the pace of his finger. Oh, she felt herself spiraling out of control as she undulated her hips. Her eyes closed and her lips parted as she felt herself quivering. She could feel the pressure building and at any moment it would burst. Oh my God, she screamed in her mind.

“Open your eyes for me, baby. Let me see you come.” He put pressure on her sensitive nub and she screamed. He watched the wonder that came across her face. She was like a kid that had gotten her first taste of candy. He felt her clinch around his fingers several times. He gave her a moment to calm down.

“Wow.” She said once she could catch her breath.

He smiled. “Yeah, well we aren’t finished yet.”

She put her arms around his neck and drew him closer. “Cocky, aren’t we?” She teased.

If he could stare into those chocolate-colored eyes for the rest of his life, he would be a happy man. Where had that come from? He wondered. “No. I call it confidence.” He lifted her again and placed her on her back on the bed. “This might hurt a little but I will do my best to make it hurt as little as possible, okay?”

She palmed his cheek. “I trust you, Mark.”

He nodded. He lifted her right leg and inched his way inside her, giving her time to just adjust to his size. Her eyes widened as he continued and he thought she might tell him to stop but she kept urging him on. God, she felt so good. By sheer force, he stopped himself from plunging into her but it wasn’t easy at all. When he felt the barrier, the one that would break once he thrust inside her, he kissed her deeply. The first thrust broke the barrier and he felt her stiffen beneath him and then relax. He moved slowly until she got use to the rhythm. Damn, she was a fast learner. She clenched him tightly and then let go, only to do it all over again. Then she wrapped her legs around his waist and titled her hips. Her moans of ecstasy were driving him crazy and before he knew it his thrusts became uninhibited and he was coming. Shit. He held on to her hips and continue to plunge into her wetness until he heard her scream and knew she’d gotten hers too. He rolled to the side and pulled her on top of him. For a while, their harsh breathing filled the air.

She laid her head on his chest. “I love you.”

His hand trailed down her back and he let it rest on her hip. “Love me enough to marry me, Sanaa?”

She raised her head. “Weren’t you married before?”

“And just how do you know that?”

She blushed. “I kind of kept up with what you were doing all these years.”

He drew her close until their faces were inches apart. “How?”

“Private investigator.”

His thumb trailed across her lip. “She wasn’t you. It was a mistake. We divorced less than six months into the marriage. We both knew we’d married for the wrong reasons. So, are you going to answer my question?”

“We don’t know anything about each other anymore.”

“I know enough. But we don’t have to get married tomorrow.”

God, he is such a sweetheart, she thought. How could she not want to be his wife? She didn’t need to think about it anymore. “Okay. Yes, I will marry you on one condition?”

He smiled. ” And what’s that?”

She placed a soft kiss on his lips. “That we don’t get divorced. Love me even though sometimes I may want to do bodily harm to you for being cocky.”

He laughed. “Confidence.”

She smiled. “Whatever. Do we have a deal?”

“Oh yeah, we have a deal.” He rolled her beneath him.

“I love you, Mark.” She said softly as she gazed into his eyes.

“Sweetheart, I love you too.” He kissed her deeply. No more words were needed. He showed her just how much she had mended his broken heart.

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More Than Just Friends (Part 5)

Derrick watched Rae sleeping in his bed. He wanted to watch over her and keep her close to him. She’d scared him so much that he couldn’t relax. It had been at least two hours since they’d left the hospital and he was still tense. He sighed softly. It could have been worse. Even though he knew that, he still couldn’t stop the image of her lying unconscious on the floor from flashing in his head. He’d begged her not to leave him. Which meant that he’d become dependent on her and that scared him. If it ever came to a point that Rae was no longer in his life, he just didn’t know how he would be able to go on. He wasn’t even sure how his mom lived without his dad for ten years. His biological father had died in a plane crash. He was traveling back to his family from a business trip to New York when his plane encountered heavy turbulence and crashed. His father had died instantly. He remembered that day. When he, his brothers and his mother heard the news from one of the local police officers, they all began to cry and his mother had curled into a ball and wailed. He’d felt powerless then just as he did now. Somehow, his mother had survived it and moved on with his stepfather, Joshua. He hadn’t liked Joshua at first but the man eventually began to grow on him. Now they were inseparable.
He had to stop this negative thinking and focus on the good news that they’d received. He was going to be a father. His chest swelled proudly at the thought. He couldn’t believe it. He and Rae had made a baby. None of his brothers had children yet and they were married. Although he was sure that they weren’t in a hurry to make a baby. He hadn’t been either but now that he had he was excited. He couldn’t wait to see Rae with her protruding belly. He grinned. She’d definitely fuss about that for sure.
“Derrick” Rae called softly
“Yeah baby?”
She looked down at his bed then back at him. “You brought me to your place?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“You could have taken me home, you know?”
“Did you honestly think that I would let you stay by yourself at your place with a concussion?” He said in a tone of voice that was meant to grab her attention.
Her eyes narrowed at his tone of voice. “No, of course not. I just didn’t know I was here.”
“Probably because you were asleep.” He tossed and turned to look out the window.
That’s it, she thought. She eased out of the bed to go stand in front of him. She planted her hands on her hips. “Are you trying to piss me off? Because I am about one second from biting your head off, Derrick.” She warned.
He met her gaze and saw the fire in her eyes. If he’d had the energy to argue, he would have. Instead of reacting, he gently pulled her to him, lifted her shirt and kissed her belly, the place his baby would be growing soon. “No, of course not. I’m sorry. I’m just still a little tense.”
She placed her hands on his head as he placed another kiss on her belly. “Why?”
“Because I was scared and still am.”
She lifted his face to meet her eyes. “Derrick, baby, listen to me. I’m fine. Correction…we are fine. Stop worrying. It will be okay.” She sat down in his lap and pulled him into her arms.
He inhaled her scent. “I love you and our baby.”
She smiled. He was so protective. “We love you too.”
He buried his face in her neck. “Don’t ever stop okay?”
She pulled back. “Even when I get mad at you?”
“Especially when you get mad at me.”
“I will have to think about it. I mean it could be a really big fight and I may not want to see y— She stopped when he placed his hand over her mouth.
“Would you stop? I’m trying to be serious here.” He removed his hand.
“Sorry. Just trying to lighten up the mood.”
“Thanks but not right now.”
An eyebrow rose. “Is this about your dad? Are you comparing the two?”
He shook his head. “No. It’s about the fact that you’re the closest person to me besides my mom and Joshua. Losing you would devastate me. Fiancé or not, losing you would kill me inside. I hate losing people and you know this about me. Yes, it started with me losing my dad to a plane crash but what I’m telling you now has nothing to do with that. I’m sorry if I’m getting to deep on you but it just got real tonight, Rae.” He sighed. “I’m going to go outside for a while.” He lifted her off him and walked out of the room…leaving her speechless and perplexed.
Two hours later and Derrick still had not come upstairs to his room. She’d long ago taken a shower and now she couldn’t sleep because Derrick wasn’t here. She hated that he was agonizing over this whole situation. She should have been more serious then maybe…no! She was not about to play the martyr here. Deciding she was hungry, she went downstairs in search of some fruit or something. He usually kept the refrigerator stocked. She opened the refrigerator door and pulled out a bowl of grapes and at the last minute she added some whip cream. Closing the door, she turned to go back upstairs but collided into a massive chest. She screamed. Strong arms kept her and her fruit from falling.
He swallowed a curse. “Rae, I’m sorry that I scared you.”
She moved away from his touch. “I’m fine. Going back upstairs now.” She made a move to get around him but he blocked her from going upstairs.
“Wait.”
“What?” She snapped
“We need to talk, Rae.”
“Like hell we do. You walked out on me remember?” She nearly shouted
He removed the fruit and whip cream from her hands. She just had to be difficult. He lifted her into arms and sat her on the bar.
“Hey! What are you doing?” She asked when he began lifting her shirt. ” You are not getting sex.”
His hands stilled for a moment, “Rae, you can fight me all you want but I want you and if this is the only way to get you to talk to me then so be it.”
She met his intense gaze. “Derrick I…” She gasped when he spread her legs and began to press his thumb against the sensitive nub between her legs. Instinctively, her hips moved with his strokes. He stopped for a moment to slide her underwear off. She watched with anticipation has his head lowered to lick her along the slit of her vagina. Her body arched off the bar but he gently guided her back down. He pulled her closer to his face and placed his full mouth on her.
“Oh my” She whispered feverishly as he continued making love to her with his mouth. She felt her orgasm about to bust loose but then he stopped.
“Derrick?”
He quickly glanced at her. “Do you forgive me, baby?”
“What? Now is not the time, Derrick,” She said, dumbfounded that he would stop in the middle of what they were doing.
“Now is the perfect time. Tell me or you won’t get to come.”
The man was devious, she concluded. “No. Let’s finish this first.” She couldn’t stop her stubbornness from rearing it’s ugly head. Two could play this game.
He shook his head. He pulled her butt to the edge of the bar and placed her feet on his shoulders. He lowered his head and blew on her sensitive spot. “Tell me, my stubborn fiancé.” He slid the tip of his finger inside and then withdrew it.
She dragged in a breath as he continued teasing her. “Dammit, okay. I…I forgive you. Please finish what you started.” She pleaded with him.
He smiled. “Thank you, baby.” He whispered and placed his mouth back on her. He teased and taunted until she screamed. He didn’t remove his mouth until she stopped trembling. “Feel better?”
“Hmm, yeah. I needed that. How long has it been since we last made love?”
“At least a week.”
She shook her head. “That just won’t do, will it?”
“No, it won’t. I’ve missed you terribly this past week. The wedding is becoming more important than me.”
She moved her feet off his shoulders and leaned forward to caress his cheek. “And does daddy need some attention?” She licked his bottom lip.
He groaned. “Desperately need some attention.” He tried to kiss her but she pulled back.
“Just so we’re clear, no walking out on me again and I promise that I won’t do anything to scare you. If I can help it.” She added, because she couldn’t control everything.
He stood and took her into his arms to go upstairs. “That’ll work.”
“Hey, what about my grapes and whip cream?”
He frowned. “Seriously? Just get them later.” He replied, in a hurry to get upstairs.
“I’m hungry, Derrick.”
Okay, she has to eat for both her and the baby, he reasoned. “Fine, we will go back and get them.”
She smiled wickedly. “We can eat them in another way, you know?”
He stopped short. “I love when you get creative. Now where are those grapes?”
She laughed. She was glad they were back on good terms again.

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